It happened. And it seems it happened so abruptly! I used to count down the days but now that it’s here I wish it wasn’t. Sweet Baby has decided he’s done nursing. I tried to fight him on it but he’d just latch and bite down right away. The last 3 feedings were not how I pictured his last times nursing. But I remind myself of the last successful feeding. We were in bed he was latched and drinking away contently. His eyes rolling in the back of his head. His hand patting my chest and occasionally coming to my mouth for a kiss. I had soft music playing and I was signing to him as I laid back and closed my eyes. It was beautiful, peaceful and perfect. Little did I know that was the last time it’d be like that. But I don’t ever want to forget. Now my body is trying to adjust to not nursing. It’s been a day n a half and I feel so full. I feel like there are rocks weighing my breasts down. I’m super sensitive my clothes can rub me wrong and it hurts. A friend told me it hurts as your milk dries up. I think it’s my body is mourning. It knows it’s time to stop and it’s as heart broken as I am. I didn’t realize how emotional this would be for me. But a friend told me this passes and you’ll be ‘excited.’ Your wardrobe options open up. Soon I’ll be able to wear my sexy bras again. If I still fit after my milk is gone.
My son has found sweet nectar from another. He loves his goat milk! I tried formula but never felt right with my decision. I’m not against formula, in many cases its the only option you have. But it was something I didn’t want to give it to Sweet Baby. But I gave into the pressure-he got diaper rash pretty much right away. He’s never had diaper rash before. My friend (who grew up on a farm) told me to give him goats milk. It’s all she gave to her children. I went to my nearest health food store and purchased pasteurized goats milk. I heated it in the sauce pan and he devoured it so quickly. He loves it! And he’s diaper rash got better immediately!
I won’t lie how jealous I am at times. Watching him enjoy that milk causes my breasts to ache. I almost cried the other night as his bottled drifted him off to sleep.
I know we are stepping into a new season. And I have many fond memories of our breast feeding journey. I’m kicking myself now, I wish I would’ve wrote most of them down. Now I will find a new special time/thing just for me & him to do.
Enjoy these moments momma’s, they are gone in a heartbeat! And all you’ll have left is memories.